"In a pisstake supernova, a pisstake suprenova in the skkkyyyyyy."
Who the hell didn't/doesn't hate Oasis?
I remember back in '96 them being heralded as "the next Beatles". (I hate the Beatles, but that's another rant.) Well, unfortunately they didn't become the Beatles—and by that I mean nobody's been shot and not one of them has died from cancer yet.
Come on people! Can't we get some lunatic to break into one of their houses and stab them in the chest?
Can't somebody shoot one of the Gallaghers? Pick one, I don't care which.
Why won't some female Yoko Ono this band? I know they're broken up which is a great thing but in the next 2 years, mark my words, one of them is going to have a shitty solo record. And when they do, there's going to be a press love affair and a push to reunite Oasis. Not fair.
How many millions a year do we spend to stop cancer? Isn't it worth $50,000 a year to figure out a way to keep Oasis apart? Can't somebody inject one of them with an African tick venom?
If anybody has any ideas on this, please share. I'm open to some jail time if it means the world's a safer place.