America. Fuck Yeah!

Satire? Or not?

Regardless happy Friday and America Fuck Yeah!

It might not be July 4th but everybody needs to go out this weekend and celebrate America by doing something retarded. Blow up a fish tank. Eat a stupid amount of hot dogs. Play the lottery.

This country wasn't founded on freedom. It was founded on the right to do stupid shit. Things the monarchs wouldn't let us do. Things like wearing a dishwashing sponge for pants. Drinking pasteurized milk. Putting glue on your hand, letting it dry and peeling it off like some kind of second skin.

So celebrate America.

America Fuck Yeah!

Dude Eggs

Okay, okay, okay, sorry about the time between posts.

I promise I am working on upgrading this horrid little site.

Until then, here's today's post—I have no idea where I grabbed it from though. All I know is it has a slang in it for testicle's I've never heard before—"Dude eggs".

Matt Fisher, I have no idea who you are but your friends are genius. They've developed a new term for nuts, nard, the boys, sack, nuggets, bollocks, coconuts, huevos, baby makers, etc. Way to go and way to use it to embarrass your friend on a bathroom wall and now the internet.

What's your favorite term for balls? 


Drop it in the comment box. 

Winner will receive a week of posts dedicated to you or a Corvette. I haven't decided which yet.

THAT CHINAMEN IS RUNNING THEM CHEAP SHELLS ON ME AGAIN.

Sup.

Alright before the holidays I made a bunch of promises—a ton of new photos, a new design to this crudhole and gold baseball caps for everybody.

Well I didn't do none of it. None of it.

Instead of spending the holidays in mens rooms around the greater midwest looking like a big perv, I spent my holidays in the movie theater and in sports documentary heaven.

With almost 30 hours of ESPN's 30 for 30 series under my belt, I decided it was time to leave the house and hit the theaters for more media binging. First and best movie I saw True Grit.

A truly, truly treat film. I'd give a full on review of it but, that's not what this blog is about AND I feel like anything I say at this point has already been said by the likes of Ebert and every movie critic.

(Except maybe Gene Shalit—"Kiss my True Gritssssss... Jeff Bridges crows as Rooster Cogburn and Matt Damon is Da Man as the delicious, tasty and flame broiled LaBeouf... HAAAA.")

Go see it, The Dude really does abide and is fantastic.

As for this blog, it will get an overhaul. Right now it's 3rd in the list of things I'm working on. The regular posting will resume starting now o'clock. So get ready for more Shit Talking.